I'm Back | 07/13/06

Where to begin...it's been a week and I'm not sure I remember how to blog except I know it involves not using many paragraphs and not saying anything interesting. I was in Orlando for the last week at a marketing conference where I was somehow selected to speak. There were about 1200 people at the conference and I would say a good sixth of them saw my high-energy, high-interest lecture on affiliate marketing. There were a couple of awkard pauses where the mob of 200 people, all of whom essentially get paid to run their big fat mouths for a living, said nothing and looked blankly as though I was talking about quantam mechanics or Schenkerian theory. Oh well. I got a lot of nice feedback but the makeup of people was such that I think I'd rather go back to cleaning toilets than go to another one. I did manage to meet a few really talented, smart people (whose heads weren't professionally sutured up their assholes) including our CJ account rep Brian. I really wanted to tell him he should leave his company and do something that would make him happier; one of those people that you know would succeed in any profession so you have to wonder what the allure of a certain job is. Unfortunately it was not my place after only a couple hours so I kept my mouth shut. Of the 1200 people I would have to estimate that about 1100 of them should be put down. I mean that in the nicest way of course but if you're contributing nothing to your business NOR society what purpose are you serving? Begging, lying and buying others beers is not really how the world works. Unless of course it is and I just don't get it. I think I do get it though because my company is doing well and I would like to think that I contribute daily to that succeess. I just wish people would shut up for about 30 seconds before they speak. That's all.

Upon my return I did three things: lose at poker, buy pchris' drumset and take Chompy to the vet. Chompy was given a clean dog-bill of health so I feel like a pretty good Food Guy. And she's dropped a pound since last year. Score! The vet advised I feed her 1/4 less food each day so I think I'll give that a try. I was trying to fatten her up a little bit for the long, harsh winters fights with jamie's sisters dog but with him living in Jacksonville Chompy and I are probably safe from his cruel attacks.

In sadder news, three weeks from now five of my friends will be moved away. Bummer.

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